Crafting a Healthy Home Rhythm Part 7 - Get Pen & Paper

Hopefully you have been keeping up with our series and by now you know that rhythm is much more than just painting on a certain day and going to the market on a certain day. Rhythm is the foundation for living. It defines who you are, how you respond to things and also how you are raising your children. Your rhythm will probably look pretty different than mine - it should - mine can be a guide as you get started, but over time you should create your own. This helps you to own it, love it and most of all uphold it! It will likely change as your family changes, this keeps it from getting stale but also helps you to tailor it to your family.

Today, I want you to grab a pen and paper. Better yet, get a pencil. Do you have one that you love? I am an office supply nerd. I love things that are just MINE :) Pretty paper. Awesome pen & pencil. Good stuff. 

First, make a list of all the chores you need to get done, big and small. I am here to tell you that you may NOT wait until your house is clean and decluttered to start this! We are starting it now :) There will always be a reason to delay - you have the tools now though, so now you are bound! You are now a find-a-way, make-a-way woman. No more excuses right? Just make the list.

Make a list of all the things you want to fit into your rhythm.

Now draw out your week. You can use a plain paper calendar to write it out or you can draw something pretty.  I love to use pretty pencils and  have fun with this.  Remember this IS fun.  Life IS fun.  If you are feeling burned out and you don't like yourself or your children then you need to go back to Part 1! 

Ok, Make sure you put EVERYTHING on here the first time you do it. We will do it a few times to get it right, but for the first ones, we are just getting it down on paper. You must put everything here so you can see it all. Write in when your partner leaves for work, comes home, meal times, school time, your weekly appointment to the chiropractor.... WRITE IT DOWN. You are worrying about time, so let's really see where it is all going. For many moms, this is a huge surprise. For many moms, this is when they get the realization that more is not better :) This is when you get a dose of reality. I promise, it gets better. 

Now, what on your weekly rhythm can be deleted, consolidated or otherwise altered? If you have a standing appointment with someone every week, can you move it to a day when you are already planning to leave the house so you don't have to go twice?  Of course the little ones need home time, but also, don't underestimate the older ones that need it too.  Of course, big kids are generally more social and you can really meet that need, but let's be deliberate about it and really make sure that your week works for everyone.  I make sure that anything that could possible affect our home rhythm is taken into account and if it doesn't work for the littlest one, well the older child will get over it. The big kids are encouraged to work together to find rides and public transportation when they can.  My teens have used the buddy system and learned how to get along so they can go alone together on our public train and bus.  I want them to be able to rely on each other and understand the layout of their city.  Life skills.  I wouldn't worry about this until 12+.

Now that you are looking more closely at things, you might be ready to tell me just how social your 7yo is and how they just can't give up that oboe lesson or swim team practice.  Yes they can.  Consolidate it, change the time to fit your needs or find a way to make peace with it in your rhythm.  I keep a general rule of 2 activities per child AFTER they are in first grade.  That is MORE than enough.  Simplicity is the key here. 

Ok,  we have a chore list and a basic weekly schedule on paper.  What's next?  Let's look at a bare bones menu.  Come on!  WRITE IT DOWN.  It isn't hard... you don't have to be super specific... you can segment your breakfasts into a grain day, a muffin day, an egg day, etc. You can refine it as you make your weekly shopping list, right now you just want to get it down on paper.  Make sure it is food you like!  For lunches, keep it simple - find a handful of things that everyone likes and stick to it for now.  Remember that the point is to simplify your life, it isn't to make an elaborate menu.  Same with dinner... pasta night, soup night, rice night, ethnic night, etc.  Think logically about things, for instance, I make pasta sauce on Monday so I can turn leftovers into creamy tomato soup on Tuesday, etc. When I make my special German egg noodles, I make two batches so I can freeze one.  When I buy frozen fruit and greens for smoothies, I prep a week + at a time and freeze the fruit so I can just grab the bag from the freezer.  This is about working smarter, not harder.

I often hear the objection that you are using a different diet.  I work with the premise that we have a whole diet as often as possible and I am here to tell you that it can be done.  I make my own butter, skim my own cream, make my own kefir... with prep and planning you can do anything!  Plan it all into your rhythm.  I like to get milk on Wednesday, skim the cream Thursday morning, make butter from the settled and separated cream on Friday.  Make creamy soup with the left over almost week old cream on Tuesday, etc. We grind wheat on one day and bake on the next.  The keys are really to plan it out and then stay on top of it.  Of course going out of town or getting sick get us off a bit, but there again, I can make a plan when we go out of town.  That plan includes enough food left at home for two+ meals when we return.  I also make sure I leave with a clean house so we can come home and do laundry and step right back into life... I also do loads of laundry when we are gone just so it lightens my load when I get home.  Now sickness is another story.  While your daily prep will suffer, if you have been doing your job, you should be ahead just a bit.  If you have been planning and shopping for your meals ahead then it shouldn't be too hard to be out of commission for a couple days.  Planning it out sets you free - MUCH freer than winging it!

We have the nuts and bolts here.  What next?  Where is the fluff?  We are NOT going to worry about fluff right now.  What is fluff?  Fluff is the sweet dinner verse you saw some blog about, complete with pictures of a lit candle and everyone sitting still.  FLUFF.  We aren't going to worry about that in this post.  We can worry about that in the next post.  Think of it this way... you just brought home the cutest chair... maybe from IKEA (LOL, I am a little obsessed) the chair is one of those awesome comfy ones with a nice pad... maybe you even sprang for the leather because you are *sure* your 4yo is over the writing on furniture stage.  You come home, open the box.  Hmmm.... you REALLY want to sit on that comfy chair pad!  It is your favorite color, you want it now. How are you going to get that far?  Well Mama... you gotta build the darn chair!  If you don't take out those annoying wordless IKEA instructions and try to figure out what the little rotund man is trying to build then the cushion is completely useless. Maybe you can use it as a pillow?  WHY.... build the dang chair!!!  Get up!  Do it.  Do it so you can sit on the cushion... or the fluff.  The fluff of Waldorf is wonderful.  The play silks and the fairies and the gnomes and the birthday rings on the dinner table and the pretty cards on the nature table and the expensive paints and and and .... the awesome bedtime routine that another mom posted and all the day you thought "I just want to send Johnny into dream land like that mom does!"  Hey... that mom has bad days too... she just doesn't shoot those with her Canon. :)  That mom maybe has been raised this way or she has, like me been doing it since the dawn of time .... ok not that long. Sure you can put that cushion on your sofa and then sit or lay on it, but it won't be the same.  That cushion belongs on  that chair.  Get busy. Build the chair.  When you get frustrated because *somehow* the screws for the chair don't line up with the holes (of course that NEVER happens with IKEA right?!) don't get discouraged.  Take the screw out, try to see if it is user error... maybe it was going in crooked or maybe you have to grab your husband's drill and fix the hole.... whatever you have to do, build the chair. Then when the chair is built.... place your beautiful cushion on it.  Hide the Sharpies from your 4yo and brew some tea, grab a good book and curl up.  Be fed.  Be excited.  You built the chair.  You love this cushion. You are going to protect it from that Sharpie no matter what and if somehow that crafty little person finds where you hid the Sharpie and writes on your awesome cushion... you will breathe, you will remember that because the chair is built, you can readjust the cushion so no one can see the stain.

Mama... you can do this.  I know you can.  I am here to help.

Part 1 HERE
Part 2 HERE
Part 3 HERE
Part 4 HERE
Part 5 HERE
Part 6 HERE

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