The changes at age 9 are very different from those at any other stage. I found the changes at 6 (traversed it personally 5 times) much easier, but it does give you some prep for 9. The changes at 12, 14, 16 are way easier than age 9 (at least in my experience.) I sort of think of some of the changes like this... If 6 is leaving Eden, the changes at 6 are often sadness and frustration at the loss of being small, the changes at 9, are a follow up to that. At 9, they are smacked with some of the horror of the world, they are mad about their new found independent feelings but they can't do a ton (in their eyes) about their surroundings.

I HAVE found that parents who struggle have kids that struggle more, but that being said MOST kids struggle to some degree. Most get mad, frustrated, irritable, self righteous, indignant and just plain rude at times during the change. The outbursts have a lot to do with home life, exposure to negative people AND in my opinion, temperament.

My melancholic...